Marriage need not bring on an identity crisis; there are plenty of name combinations to satisfy each individual’s desires. When Joel Lorberblatt and Ronon O’Neill were married in 2003, the Madison couple was certain of one thing: They wanted to have the same last name. “It was open for discussion, and I always thought Lorberblatt was a really interesting name,” Joel says. “But my wife has lived her life with a unique first name, Ronon, so she didn’t feel like she needed another to add another layer of interest with a last name like Lorberblatt.” Joel legally changed his last name to O’Neill, “not for any altruistic or fanciful reason, just for practicality.”
There are also myriad combinations when merging names; some couples create a new last name to equally reflect each person’s heritage. That option appealed to Doug Grys and Kate Grover when they married in 1998. The couple, now living in Madison, wanted one name to represent them both. “My brother toasted us at our wedding, saying that he was sure we’d make a name for ourselves. And we did.” Both Doug and Kate changed their last name to Grovergrys, “and I’m pretty sure we’re the only Grovergrys family in the world.”
Then, of course, there’s the traditional route, in which the bride takes the groom’s last name. That’s the approach Amy Estervig of Stoughton took when she married Shawn Elmer in April 2009. “It’s kind of my family’s tradition not to take the husband’s name, and I thought I’d be different and stand out in my family,” Amy says. “I wanted us to be the Elmers, and I felt no loss of identity.”
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