Weddings are all about love, laughter, and bringing the best people together - and that means you! Couples spend so much time and care dreaming up every detail of their day, and they can’t wait to share it with you. Your energy, excitement and good vibes are a big part of what makes it all unforgettable. By showing up ready to celebrate (and maybe shed a happy tear or two), you’re helping to make the magic even brighter. To help you bring your A-game, here’s your ultimate cheat sheet of do’s and don’ts for being the guest everyone’s thrilled to have at the party!
DO...
✅ RSVP on Time
According to Nicole Saavedra of Nicole Christine Styling, one of the simplest and most respectful things you can do is respond to your invitation promptly. A timely RSVP helps the couple secure an accurate guest count, which is essential for organizing seating, catering, and event logistics. When you confirm or decline your invitation, you're helping them avoid last-minute surprises and ensuring that everyone, from the kitchen staff to the wedding planner, can plan accordingly.
✅ Follow the Dress Code
"Make sure to follow the dress code or theme specified on the invitation," recommends Cass Stone of C.Mae Photography. Whether it’s a formal black-tie affair or a laid-back garden wedding, the couple has carefully considered the dress code for a reason. Follow the guidelines and avoid wearing anything too flashy or inappropriate. Remember, you’re not the star of the show - just a part of it! Your outfit should reflect respect for the couple and the occasion.
✅ Arrive On Time
Punctuality is key! Arriving late for the ceremony or reception disrupts the flow of the day and may mean missing out on important moments. Aim to arrive at least 15 minutes early to give yourself time to settle in and enjoy the pre-ceremony atmosphere.
✅ Respect the Seating Chart
Don’t try to move things around or switch seats. The couple has put a lot of thought into the seating arrangements, and respecting this plan helps avoid confusion or uncomfortable situations. It's all part of ensuring the day goes smoothly for everyone involved.
✅ Take Behind-the-Scenes Photos
While unplugged ceremonies remain a popular trend, modern wedding guest etiquette is evolving to reflect both technological advancements and a shift toward more streamlined celebrations. Maria Bartolotta of The Bartolotta Restaurants notes that many couples are now embracing the idea that guests using their phones can capture candid, behind-the-scenes moments and unique angles that professional photographers might miss. "This adds a more personal and spontaneous layer to the memories," states Bartolotta. As long as the couple hasn't requested no photos, guests can enhance the wedding experience by capturing those small, heartfelt moments that might otherwise be overlooked.
✅ Be Clear and Honest About Dietary Needs
If you have dietary restrictions or preferences, communicate them early. This helps the couple and caterers ensure everyone is well-fed and happy, without any last-minute surprises.
✅ Respect Personal Boundaries and Social Cues
"Being mindful of personal boundaries and social cues can help create a more enjoyable experience for everyone involved," says Saavedra of Nicole Christine Styling. Respecting others’ personal space, knowing when to engage in conversation, and paying attention to the mood of the event helps ensure everyone feels comfortable and welcomed. Whether it’s recognizing when someone needs a break from dancing or giving guests room to chat without interruption, tuning into social cues allows the day to flow smoothly and fosters a positive atmosphere for all.
DON'T...
🚫 Ignore RSVP Deadlines (or Show Up Without Responding)
Showing up unannounced can cause unnecessary disruptions and throw off the couple’s carefully planned schedule, as Saavedra of Nicole Christine Styling advises. It’s always best to follow the RSVP instructions and arrive at the designated time to ensure everything runs smoothly. A missing RSVP means the couple has to scramble to accommodate you, potentially upsetting the seating arrangements, catering and more. Always respond to invitations promptly.
🚫 Overshare on Social Media Before the Couple Posts
In today's digital age, it's tempting to share moments instantly. However, posting photos or details about the wedding before the couple has had a chance to share their own can be seen as a significant faux pas. Tia Hoffmann of Beauty Unveiled by Tia emphasizes, "Oversharing on social media before the couple posts anything? That’s a huge wedding faux pas now. Let them have their moment first." Respecting the couple's privacy and allowing them to make the first announcement ensures their special day remains centered around them.
🚫 Ask to Bring Kids or a Plus-One
"Ever since Covid, I feel that most couples have rewritten the game on what they want to prioritize, and cater less to family & friends' opinions for their wedding day," shares Katie Berglin, owner of Blu Photography & Design. "With this shift, it's important to respect the couple's decisions, including guest lists. Don't put the couple in an uncomfortable position by asking to bring your kids or a plus-one. You were invited to celebrate their day, so honor their wishes and enjoy the celebration as they’ve planned it. If the invitation doesn’t include your kids or a guest, accept the invitation as is or choose to gracefully decline."
🚫 Wear White
(or Anything Too Close to White)
White, ivory, and other pale shades should be avoided - those colors are reserved for the bride. You don’t want to outshine the bride on her special day! Stick to other beautiful hues that complement the theme without drawing attention away from the main event.
🚫 Use Your Phone During the Ceremony
"And most importantly, please refrain from using your phone during the ceremony," advises Stone of C.Mae Photography. "Let the pros capture the moment while you focus on being present with the newlyweds and fully immerse yourself in the experience." Putting away your phone helps preserve the sanctity of the moment and allows everyone to enjoy the ceremony without distractions.
🚫 Bring Uninvited Guests
As Jennifer Janssen of Jennifer Janssen Bridal Artistry advises, "If they’re not listed on the invitation, they’re not invited. Respect the couple’s guest list - weddings are planned with intention, budget and space in mind." Bringing an uninvited guest can cause disruptions and create logistical challenges for both the couple and their vendors. Trust that if the couple wanted you to bring someone, they would have made it clear. Honor their planning and space limitations by attending solo if your invitation is addressed that way.
🚫 Snag Decor
Those gorgeous floral arrangements aren't party favors (unless stated otherwise). Unless explicitly mentioned, don’t assume you can take home any of the floral decor. Taking items without permission can lead to the couple incurring extra charges for missing pieces.
🚫 Overindulge at the Bar
"Please avoid overconsumption and be mindful of your behavior, as being sloppy can be embarrassing for everyone," advises Stone of C.Mae Photography. While it’s fine to enjoy a drink or two, excessive drinking can lead to disruptive behavior that detracts from the celebration. "Sloppy behavior can create discomfort for everyone involved," states Stone. Keep it classy and respectful to ensure the celebration remains enjoyable for all.
Photo by Blu Photography + Design
